Welcome to my Kind Journey Blog!
Kind Journey is a place you visit daily for quotes, poetry, stories (and sometimes easy recipes or projects) that are designed to inspire, calm, motivate and educate you on your own life journey.
Lisa:-) ~ A little Love Can Change A Life ~ A little Rain Can Straighten A Flower Stem ~ Anonymous
We can't wait to see you at Floyd Wickman's Master Sales Society 2014 Winter FORUM. We've heard lots of questions about how to set a transaction goal for next year, so let's begin at the beginning.
Setting A Goal - STEP ONE
Setting any kind of goal starts with establishing your income goal.
Rather than just picking a random number because it looks big or feels right or sounds important, let's put some thought and research into this, so that your number has some gravity to it.
Start with the basic necessities: food, clothing and shelter for you and your dependents.
Add to that the cost of running your business, from marketing to admin to professional dues, etc.
And there's transportation and education. How much are you investing in your education, or in funding the education of your children?
Now think about funding your retirement. And paying the government.
Are you tithing, pledging or giving to charity?
What else do you want to do next year? Vacations, recreation, hobbies and fun.
And, finally, how much do you need or want to serve that PURPOSE you discovered with the 5 Why's exercise in the Focus Organizer?
Total it up.
This is the number we are converting into closings - and then into sales and sold listings - and then into listings obtained - and then into listing appointments - and then into conversations, numbers dialed and time prospecting . . . so it is the foundation number for all of our planning.
Take your time with establishing this income target. The more reality it has to it, the more power it will have to prevent procrastination and rationalization, the two cleverest enemies of focused, purposeful activity.
If you come to FORUM with the right income goal, we'll help you do all the rest of the calculations so that you start 2014 with clarity. And don't miss our own Jack Alia's all new break out session on Friday afternoon to complete your goal setting steps.
See you in Ann Arbor! Click HERE to register for...
The Master Sales Society 2014 Winter FORUM!
We wish you all Happy Holidays, and your best year ever in 2014!
How would you like to open three early Holiday gifts from Floyd? Well, here they are. Just for you. Go ahead, it’s OK. Gift #1 – A laser beam focus on your goal for 2014 Click here to download the Focus Organizer – and you can:
Put your Purpose in to your Goal and your Goal into your Purpose
Track your SMART Numbers and quarterly ROCKS
Put Floyd’s 11 Step Goal Achieving Checklist into action
Develop your selling skills with a self-coaching rating system
Use the “Wickman Formula” for converting your income goal into closings
Convert closings into sales and sold listings
Determine how many listings, listing appointments and conversations you need to have
Stay in control of your prospecting time each week
Gift #3 - Unshakable belief that you can and will achieve your goal in 2014
Listen to Floyd’s powerful message How To Be In Positive Control Of Your Life — Part One and Part Two and you will learn how to:
Strengthen your relationships
Avoid being manipulated in any situation
Show the people you care about most how much you care
Put the power of positive affirmation to work for you
But folks, these are just the stocking-stuffers. How would you like to get all of these gifts and much, much more live and in person from Floyd himself, the Floyd Wickman Team, and your most generous and productive colleagues in the Master Sales Society?
A ton of ideas, objective advice, practical solutions, the latest in employing technology, skill building, networking, motivation and inspiration – well, you get the picture.
But you won’t get them at home. So come to Ann Arbor and join us for the annual Winter FORUM. Click HERE to register.
The Floyd Wickman Team
"People use the word 'love' a lot of different ways. Take me, for instance. I am often heard saying that I love my mom and dad. I am also often heard saying that I love pizza. What am I saying when I say I love my mom and dad? I'm saying that I care about them. I'm saying that I love spending time with them and that I talk to them every chance I get. I'm saying that if they needed me, I would do every humanly possible to help them. I'm saying that I always want what's best for them. What am I saying when I say I love pizza? Am I saying that I care deeply about pizza? Am I saying that I have a relationship with pizza? Am I saying that if pizza had a problem, I would be there for the pizza? (What? Not enough pepperoni? I'll be right there!) Of course not. When I say I love pizza, I'm just saying that I enjoy eating pizza until I don't want any more pizza. Once I'm tired of the pizza, I don't care what happens to the rest of it. I'll throw it away. I'll feed it to the dog. I'll stick it in the back of the refrigerator until it gets all green and moldy. It doesn't matter to me anymore. These are two very different definition of the word 'love'. It gets confusing when people start talking about love, and especially about loving you. Which way do these people love you? Do they want what is best for you, or do they just want you around because it is good for them, and they don't really care what happens to you? Next time someone looks deeply into your eyes and says 'I love you', look very deeply right back and say, 'Would that be pizza love, or the real thing?"
This time of year I am reminded of the talented and loved Dick & Magna Duggan ~
Dick was funny & full of spunk and like to push buttons...
Magna was ever the worrier and a charming and loving Mom, friend & wife.
Missing you both <3 br="">
Duggan, Richard Joseph Of Richfield, passed away Oct. 23, 2010. Born Dec. 6, 1921 on the family farm in Edina to parents, John and Mae. Preceded in death by siblings, William, Robert, John, Bill, and Mary Jean. Loving husband, father, grandfather, and great- grandfather. Survived by wife of 63 years, Magna; children, Dick, Sheila, Joe (Colleen), Steve, Susan (Lane); grandchildren, Cary, Michael (Valerie), Ashley, Andrew, Sam, Ben, Steven, Katie; great-grandchild, Tristan; sister, Kathleen Duggan; nieces, nephews and friends. Richard was honorably discharged from the US Navy, retired Captain Hennepin County Sheriff's Dept. in charge of County and City Jail, served as Deputy Sheriff for 27 years.
Duggan, Magna age 92, of Minneapolis, MN. Born October 9, 1919 in Dale, Norway to parents John and Martha Cleveland. Died Feb. 28, 2012. Preceded in death by husband, Richard J.; son, Richard T. and brother, Olaf Cleveland. Loving mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and aunt. Survived by children, Sheila, Joe (Colleen), Steve, Susan; grandchildren, Cary, Michael, Ashley, Andrew, Sam, Ben, Steven and Katie; great-grandchild, Tristan; brother, Norman Cleveland; sisters- in-law, Kathleen Duggan and Marlys Cleveland; nieces, nephews, cousins in Norway, and many friends.
A plurality report
that a boss' gender would make no difference
by Frank Newport and Joy Wilke
PRINCETON, NJ -- If Americans were taking a new job and had their choice of a
boss, they would prefer a male boss over a female boss by 35% to 23%, although
four in 10 would have no preference. These attitudes have not changed much in
recent years, but when Gallup first asked this question in 1953, 66% of
Americans preferred a male boss, while just 5% preferred working for a
These most recent data are from Gallup's annual Work and Education survey,
conducted Aug. 7-11, 2013. Gallup asks this question of all Americans,
regardless of their employment status or work history; the responses of working
Americans and those who are not employed were similar in the most recent
The proportion of Americans who prefer a female boss has increased by 18
percentage points over the past six decades, while there has been a 31-point
decline in the percentage who would prefer a male boss. Americans are also
significantly more likely today than in 1953 to volunteer that they do not have
The 23% of Americans who would opt to work for a woman is the highest in the
history of Gallup's asking this question since 1953, although it is essentially
the same as in several previous surveys. Preference for Female Boss Higher Among Those Who Currently Work for
Fewer Americans today say they work for a female boss than a male boss, and
this structural aspect of the workplace in turn likely affects their
Among working Americans, 54% say they currently work for a man, while 30%
work for a woman. Those who currently work for a woman are as likely to prefer
having a female boss as a male one. This is one of the few subgroups of the
population that does not tilt in the "male boss" direction. Those who currently
work for a man prefer a male boss, by 35% to 17%.
It is difficult to establish direction of the relationship between the gender
of one's current boss and one's preference for the gender of a boss; it is
possible that workers who initially prefer a female boss are more likely to end
up in circumstances in which they have a female boss. It is also possible that
the experience of working for a female boss affects workers' preferences. If the
latter is the case, and if the proportion of U.S. workers who have female bosses
increases in the future, the current preference for a male boss in the overall
population could dissipate.
Other key differences in preferences for male or female bosses across
subgroups include the following:
Both men and women prefer a male boss. More than half of men say the gender
of their boss makes no difference, but those who have a preference favor a male
boss by an 11-point margin. Women are more likely than men to have a preference,
with higher proportions expressing preferences for each gender of boss,
though women choose a male over a female boss by a 13-point margin.
There are some differences by age, with Americans between 35 and 54 the
least likely to prefer a male boss. Younger Americans are generally not more
likely than average, or less likely, to prefer a male boss.
Political partisanship significantly predicts attitudes toward the gender of
one's boss, with Democrats essentially breaking even in their preferences, while
independents and Republicans prefer a male boss.
Americans of all education levels prefer a male boss, by margins ranging
from seven to 14 percentage points.
Although four in 10 Americans do not have a preference for a male or a female
boss, those who do would rather work for a man than a woman -- as they have
since Gallup began asking this question in 1953.
The minority of working Americans who have a female boss break even in their
preferences for the gender of their boss, suggesting that if the
percentage of Americans who work for a woman increases, so might the percentage
who would rather work for a woman. However, young Americans' preferences are in
line with the average, which suggests that the aging of today's workforce may
not in and of itself produce changes in these attitudes in the years ahead.
Key remaining questions center on the reasons or explanations for people's
preference of a male or female boss, particularly relating to workers'
experience with male or female bosses -- and what can be learned from those
preferences that can be used to maximize worker engagement and foster a more
productive work environment. Future Gallup research will look at these
Results for this Gallup poll are based on telephone interviews conducted Aug.
7-11, 2013, on the annual Gallup Work and Education Survey, with a random sample
of 2,059 adults, aged 18 and older, living in all 50 U.S. states and the
District of Columbia.
For results based on the total sample of national adults, one can say with
95% confidence that the margin of sampling error is ±3 percentage points.
For results based on the total sample of 1,039 adults employed full or part
time, one can say with 95% confidence that the margin of sampling error is ±4
For results based on the total sample of 605 Americans with a male boss, one
can say with 95% confidence that the margin of sampling error is ±4 percentage
For results based on the total sample of 340 Americans with a female boss,
one can say with 95% confidence that the margin of sampling error is ±5
Interviews are conducted with respondents on landline telephones and cellular
phones, with interviews conducted in Spanish for respondents who are primarily
Spanish-speaking. Each sample of national adults includes a minimum quota of 50%
cellphone respondents and 50% landline respondents, with additional minimum
quotas by region. Landline and cell telephone numbers are selected using
random-digit-dial methods. Landline respondents are chosen at random within each
household on the basis of which member had the most recent birthday.
Samples are weighted to correct for unequal selection probability,
nonresponse, and double coverage of landline and cell users in the two sampling
frames. They are also weighted to match the national demographics of gender,
age, race, Hispanic ethnicity, education, region, population density, and phone
status (cellphone only/landline only/both, and cellphone mostly). Demographic
weighting targets are based on the March 2012 Current Population Survey figures
for the aged 18 and older U.S. population. Phone status targets are based on the
July-December 2011 National Health Interview Survey. Population density targets
are based on the 2010 census. All reported margins of sampling error include the
computed design effects for weighting.
In addition to sampling error, question wording and practical difficulties in
conducting surveys can introduce error or bias into the findings of public
opinion polls. View
methodology, full question results, and trend data.
For more details on Gallup's polling methodology, visit www.gallup.com.
How I Learned the DIFFERENCE Between the Two…
by Hall of Fame Speaker and Author Floyd Wickman
I’ve been thinking a lot this week about my first opportunity to speak to the
men’s group at my church. It was during some of the toughest economic times
that have ever hit my home town area in Michigan. Preparing, I thought about
those who would be in my audience – many of whom had lost their jobs, lost the
equity they’d built in their homes, or postponed their retirement plans. Some
were facing even more adversities ahead. How could my message move them to
believe in themselves again? How could I make a difference in their lives?
I decided to check with my Big Brother Zig. Before long, we were discussing
the Michigan economy and its unemployment rate, which was approaching an
all-time high. As always, he had a lesson for me. “When adversity strikes, you have two choices: to “react” or to
I remember feeling confused when he said this. I thought reacting and
responding were the same thing. The dictionary even uses one to define the
other, so how could they be opposite choices? But Zig patiently explained the
difference. He said that we always have two choices when adversity comes
along. We can “react” negatively, suffering the consequences of the adversity.
Or we can choose to “respond” positively, turning the negatives into benefits,
or as they say, “make lemons into lemonade.”
Imagine you are in a boxing ring. You face your opponent. You get hit hard
and are knocked down to the mat. You “react” by falling. When you get back up
to keep fighting, you have moved past the reaction. Now, you are choosing to
Every human being encounters changes in their lives that are negative. It is
part of being alive. How we perceive those changes, choosing to “react”
negatively or to “respond” positively, is completely up to each individual.
This is free will, and it is one of God’s gifts to us. We are able to choose
what we want to think and believe.
These times we live in have both adversities and opportunities aplenty! Ask
yourself: Have you been reacting or responding?
I loved this lesson and wanted to share it from my new book, Lessons From My
Brother Zig. Learn more about it here! I’d love
to hear what you think!
"People talk about the reality of their life as if it is important. And we want you to understand it's only the temporary indicator. Do you go to the gas station-your gas gauge is on empty-do you go to the gas station and look at your gas gauge in horror? 'How did this happen? Why, why, why did this happen to me?' Do you lay your head on the steering wheel and just sob? 'Oh, look what it's come to. I'm finished. I've lived all of this life, and look where I am.' Or do you just fill up?"
I am what you might call a recovering junk food addict.
One that had an especially strong penchant for candy. And while I've managed to
get my sweet tooth under control in recent years, I still have quite a weakness
for homemade versions of classic treats. Being able to create them without
preservatives or strange ingredients makes this a justifiable weakness, I'd dare
Peanut butter cups are
one of the simplest sweets to make. There's no need to fuss with tempering chocolate
or tentatively hovering over a pan of scary-hot sugar. All you need is a handful
of ingredients (most of which you probably already have in your pantry), some
wrappers, a stove (or microwave), and a fridge. Dangerously easy,
You can customize your
peanut butter cups in a number of ways: use dark chocolate instead of milk chocolate;
sprinkle the tops with a little sea salt or cayenne; or make them vegan by using
dairy-free chocolate, vegan sugar, and coconut oil instead of butter.
I opted for a
combination of dark and milk chocolate here, and chose an unsalted peanut butter so I
could flavor them with Sichuan sea salt. The result: one heck of a peanut butter
cup. The dark chocolate and the floral Sichuan spice give them a hint of
sophistication, and make for an all-around delicious treat.
1 cup of creamy unsalted peanut butter 4 tablespoons of unsalted butter, softened 1/3 cup light brown
sugar 3/4 cup of
powdered sugar 1 teaspoon of coarse sea salt (or
more, to taste; I used Sichuan salt) 32 ounces of high-quality chocolate (use milk chocolate if
you really want to mimic the classic flavor)
Mix together peanut butter, butter, sugars, and salt in
a bowl. Taste, then add more salt if needed.
Roughly chop chocolate, then melt it in a heavy-bottomed
saucepan over low heat on the stove top (or in 30-second increments in the
microwave, stirring in between) until smooth. Transfer half to a heatproof
Arrange mini cupcake wrappers on
a baking sheet. Pour just enough chocolate in to fill the bottom of the wrapper
about 1/8 inch. Gently lift and drop the tray once or twice to flatten out the
chocolate, then place in the fridge for 10 minutes.
While the chocolate is chilling, begin shaping heaping
teaspoons of peanut butter filling into discs about the diameter of a quarter,
and setting them aside on parchment paper. Remove the chilled chocolate from the
fridge, then place each peanut butter disc into a cupcake wrapper.
Transfer the remaining chocolate to your heatproof
measuring cup. (If it isn't as warm or pourable as you'd like, reheat it for a
moment or two on the stove top, or for 10 to 15 seconds in the microwave.) Pour
into cupcake wrappers until peanut butter discs are just covered. Once you've
covered all of them, gently lift and drop the tray again to even out the
chocolate, then add more to the wrappers as needed.
Sprinkle the tops with
a little extra coarse
sea salt if you like, then place the tray in the fridge for 30 minutes.
Eat them straight from the fridge (if you're a chilled chocolate guy or gal,
like me), or let them soften for about 5 minutes at room temperature.
Lately I’ve had thoughts I never thought I would think.These thoughts are more reactions (and blows)
to my careful vision of the family I wanted; the family I tried to create.In my head I always saw a Mom and a Dad and a
boy and a girl.I saw beautiful dimple
cheeked cherubs with sparkling personalities and wonderful traits.My traits, his traits, our traits. My vision
was clear, a loving couple raising amazing kids. A family that worked together
played together but most importantly loved each other; and for two whole
decades my vision was real. The times were challenging but fun and at night, we
always took the time to glance into their bedrooms to marvel at those beautiful
creatures we called our own; our kids.
Recently I took a personality inventory test that revealed
that my energy level bordered hyper.That
at times I’m too enthusiastic and that my leadership style may make others
uncomfortable. The next step down from hyper was energetic.Where am I going with this?Let me explain.When I realized that others might perceive me
as too enthusiastic and hyper, I realized that my perception of the world might
be off track with regards to the people who share relationships with me too.If I make strangers uncomfortable, then what
do I do to you my family? Me, eternally optimistic me?
Right now at this place
in time, I cannot stop the thoughts that surge in my head. They are worrisome
and troubling and I am battling them like a Spartan at war.The thoughts = the feelings that are so
foreign to me that I feel like I’m trapped in a b-rated horror film from 50's.
The words that come to mind are: disappointed, sickened, worried, disgusted,
resigned, hopeless, helpless, embarrassed, directionless, horrified, meaningless,
lost and alone.
I am grieving her.
I am deeply sad about saying goodbye to my
vision but amazingly, however, I am not depressed.I am not despondent and I am not deterred from
dreaming new dreams or charting a new course.
The daughter I thought was the angel sent from heaven the day she was
born, our gorgeous toddler with golden skin, eyes and hair. This girl who
showed signs of beautiful sensitivity and amazing creativity was our little
girl, we were so proud of her and who she was. She was the kind of girl
that was so eager to please everyone and defended the underdog on the school playground.
But something changed when she turned 14.
Our teenaged girl became dark and
moody and began to lie to us.And when
she broke the law and incurred 5 infractions and 500 dollars in fines, I
emptied her bank account to hold her accountable to pay for them.Suddenly the girl that had only one BFF her
whole life began to cycle through friends.There was Laney, then Paige, then Lacey, then Ashley, then Amber and
Alisha.Her grades plummeted and she
flunked her first year in high school, even though she was voted onto the
homecoming court.It just didn’t seem to
matter what anyone thought of her, including her peers.
In a desperate attempt to re-route and re-up
high school, we decided to hold her back and enroll her into a tiny private
school.Her grades went up, but she
began to isolate herself and the dark mood lingered.In her junior year, she made a plan to
make up her missed credits and rejoin her classmates at her original high
school. We were so optimistic.We (the
counselor, coaches, teachers and us) devised all kinds of plans for her to join
clubs and teams, and she simply rejected it all.
The downward slide simply
continued through 15, 16 and 17.
grades were great but her attitude, her choices and her new set of friends were
bad influences.Now each and every time we
encounter each other she smells like an old ashtray. She only calls me when she
needs something so I stopped taking her calls.She even went so far as to cuss me out when I wouldn’t give her money
stating that, “You still owe me money from my birthday.” To which I replied, “I
didn’t owe you anything on your birthday, I gave you your birthday!” Last
summer she ran away and we didn’t see her for a month.She returned to school this fall to knock it
out of the park.Her grades are stellar,
but again she decided to hang with the same set of kids and again ran
away.This time it was much worse
however, because she made a long emotionless statement.She said, “I have decided to leave this
family.”I don’t want this family
anymore and I hate everything you stand for.I hate everything you say and everything you do.Your life is not the life I want.Your standards are not the standards I want. I will choose my family and it won’t be you.”
"I feel like a hostage."
What do you say to that?We are now numb.We are beyond worried and stressed and now grieving
the daughter we used to have and seriously wonder what the future holds for
her.Some of the hardest parts of my day
involve conversations I have with family and friends. They don't know about our struggles. Many of them with kids the same age talking
about sports events, senior pictures, senior activities and plans for college.
I smile and nod and always say, “Wow, that’s great!” and “You must be so proud
of her!” Never letting on to my deep grief.Inside I have gravel in my gut. I never dreamed our beautiful little
girl would disappear to be replaced with a girl that looks just like her but doesn’t
act like her.The insults have cut deep
and the damage is done.I never dreamed
it would turn out like this.I heard it
through the grapevine that she was getting a job at a gas station. I can still see the images in my minds eye of a little girl full of smiles and giggles and mischief...but now its time to
forge a new dream and a new vision for my family.
Water is a great teacher that shows us how to move through the world with grace, ease, determination, and humility.
The journey of water as it flows upon the earth can be a mirror of our own paths through life. Water begins its residence on earth as it falls from the sky or melts from ice and streams down a mountain into a tributary or stream. In the same way, we come into the world and begin our lives on earth. Like a river that flows within the confines of its banks, we are born with certain defining characteristics that govern our identity. We are born in a specific time and place, within a specific family, and with certain gifts and challenges. Within these parameters, we move through life, encountering many twists, turns, and obstacles along the way just as a river flows.
Water is a great teacher that shows us how to move through the world with grace, ease, determination, and humility. When a river breaks at a waterfall, it gains energy and moves on, as we encounter our own waterfalls, we may fall hard but we always keep moving on. Water can inspire us to not become rigid with fear or cling to what’s familiar. Water is brave and does not waste time clinging to its past, but flows onward without looking back. At the same time, when there is a hole to be filled, water does not run away from it in fear of the dark; instead, water humbly and bravely fills the empty space. In the same way, we can face the dark moments of our life rather than run away from them.
Eventually, a river will empty into the sea. Water does not hold back from joining with a larger body, nor does it fear a loss of identity or control. It gracefully and humbly tumbles into the vastness by contributing its energy and merging without resistance. Each time we move beyond our individual egos to become part of something bigger, we can try our best to follow the lead of the river.
“Floyd, what’s the secret of success?” I get asked
that one a lot. I usually have to chuckle to myself a little thinking, well
gee, if I REALLY had all the answers I’d be on a mountain somewhere in robes
with people climbing up to get my advice right? Oh well, for this one – no
mountains required. The secret to success is different for everyone – depending
on what their definition of success really is. I can tell you one thing I’ve
learned through the years though with ultimate surety and that
is “There’s nothing special about special people, it’s what they do
every day that make them special.” In other words, there’s no
“secret.” Success – at least in terms of building a better business, nurturing
stronger relationships, and finding peace of mind is a matter of doing all the
necessary little things every day.
What KIND of “Little Things”?
Service: Master salespeople make this a top priority.
Their integrity, values and reputation are on the line. It’s not enough to just
be “good” at your job – when you’re working with clients, you’ve got to make
their number one goal – your number one goal. Service is about doing your best
and being your best for the people your represent. From listening (more than
talking sometimes) to fine-tuning your negotiation skills so that you can always
be sure to protect their interests to just plain developing a relationship with
them so you know where they are and how you can be help.
Commitment: This is one of those “little things” that’s
really a big thing. From the job you’re doing to the personal and professional
relationships in your life – people have to know they can count on you. That
you’re in. That if you say you’re going to do something – you do it. You don’t
have to do more – but they know you’ll never do less.
Time: It’s a precious commodity. We only get 24 hours a
day to do what we need to do. Make sure that you’re managing it well so that
the people in your life are a priority. So that you’re taking time to re-charge
and take care of yourself. And so that you’ve got systems in place and you’re
putting in the work to ensure you’ll be on track for your goals.
There’s lots of “secrets” to success. The key is to look at what success
means to you then figure out what YOU can do every day that makes you “special”
and brings you closer to where you want to go. And if you need help — contact us. We’ve been training
salespeople to succeed beyond their wildest expectations for more than 30 years.
Tell me – what’s YOUR secret?
IF you can keep your head
when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can
trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting
too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about,
don't deal in lies, Or being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet
don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make
dreams your master; If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; If
you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the
same; If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to
make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to,
broken, And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can
make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of
pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never
breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and
sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when
there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with
Kings - nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can
hurt you, If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill
the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run, Yours is
the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man,
By M Kipp You’ve probably heard about ULP before – it’s an Upper Limit Problem as defined by Gay Hendricks.
It basically means that we only allow ourselves to feel “so good” until we create behavior to prevent ourselves from feeling any better.
That is to say, we all have a thermostat of how happy we allow ourselves to be – because if we were any happier, there’s a part of us that thinks we’ll die.
I see ULP’s all the time in my work. Since I’m leading the Writer’s Mastermind here in Ubud, Bali – I’m also seeing our clients overcome their ULP’s and breakthrough to a new level of creative potential they never thought possible.
I don’t believe in self-sabotage. I think it’s a total crock. Think about it – have you ever woken up and thought to yourself, “Well, today feels like a GREAT day to sabotage my dreams?”
Of course not.
But, what I do believe in is self-protection.
We protect ourselves everyday. When we cross the street. With our financial decisions. Going to the doctor – changing our diets, etc., etc.
Protection is key to survival, but we can become too overbearing in our protection and squander our dreams.
You see, right when folks hit their ULP – they want to give up, they want to throw in the towel – but that is the exact moment that you should keep going.
All the major breakthroughs and revelations in my life have come just on the other side of not giving up.
There is a Uni-versal pattern that decrees that just outside the zone where you would normally give up is a world with a greater possibility than you could now imagine with more liberal rules for what’s possible.
The only thing keeping you stuck is a convincing story about why you can’t have what you want. You are self-sabotaging, and you are self-protecting.
But are you protecting yourself to such a degree that you are ULPing all over yourself?
What if you could take this new action, not give up and hold on just a little longer…
I stopped in to my local hardware store and I noticed my favorite employee, Lee was not there. I said, "Where's the Cowboy today?" (Lee was from Texas) and they said, "You didn't hear?" I said, "No." "Lee passed away last Friday." I was really saddened by this news. Not because Lee was a great guy, but because Lee was a grumpy guy and it was my mission to make him smile and to try to change his attitude even if just for a few minutes while he waited on me. There was a real sadness about Lee and I never knew his life story but I do know that he allowed bad experiences (whether as a victim or by his own choices) to cast a long shadow on his life. I'm gonna miss you Lee, thanks for being you because you caused me to live very consciously.
By simply being yourself, you can help the people in your life see a living example of consciousness.
1. Living by your values allows you to become a positive source of inspiration for others. Don’t hide – express yourself and embrace life without reservation. By simply being yourself, you can help the people in your life see how one person can make a difference by being a living example of consciousness.
2. When you communicate your views, do so casually and in a nondogmatic manner. Allow the people you speak with to ask questions. Offer only as much information as they are ready to hear.
3. Igniting the spark of consciousness can be as easy as giving someone a gift. A favorite book, a medicine bag, or a beautiful gemstone can pique your loved ones’ curiosity and prompt them to begin an exploration of the soul.
4. Teaching a friend, relative, or colleague to meditate or chant can put them on the path to consciousness while simultaneously reducing their stress levels.
5. Others may want to know more about living consciously but are unsure of how to begin. Starting a discussion group – even a virtual one – can help you reach out to individuals that are eager to learn.
6. By recognizing and acknowledging the inherent value in everyone you encounter, you can teach them how to value others. Sometimes, the easiest way to encourage people – even challenging ones - to respect others is to respect them first.
7. Invite people from your personal and professional lives to join you in attending a ceremony or ritual. The experience may touch them in a profound way or introduce them to a new spiritual path.
8. Casually point out the interconnectedness of all living beings using concrete, everyday examples. Many people are unaware of how their actions affect the world and are intrigued when they learn of the power they hold.
9. Introduce your loved ones to conscious living in a lighthearted and enjoyable way. Serve delicious organic recipes at gatherings, volunteer as a group, and show them how wonderful it can feel to be truly aware and connected to the universe.
"Tell everyone you know: "My happiness depends on me, so you're off the hook.' And then demonstrate it. Be happy, no matter what they're doing. Practice feeling good, no matter what. And before you know it, you will not give anyone else responsibility for the way you feel-and then, you'll love them all. Because the only reason you don't love them, is because you're using them as your excuse to not feel good."
"What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we've learned as we've moved toward that dream. That's the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one 'dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on the horizon. Every search begins with beginner's luck. And every search ends with the victor's being severely tested."
I’m going to be 87 next week. I choose to see my life moving in different directions, all of them equally good. Some things are even better now than the way they were in my youth. My younger years were filled with fear; my todays are filled with confidence.
My own life really didn’t begin to have meaning until I was in my mid-40s. At the age of 50, I began my writing career on a very small scale. The first year I made a profit of $42. At 55, I ventured into the world of computers. They scared me, but I took classes and overcame the fear. Today I have three computers and travel with my iPad and iPhone everywhere! At 60, I had my first garden. At this same time, I enrolled in a children’s art class and began to paint. At 70 and 80, I was more creative and my life continues to get richer and fuller.
I still write, I lecture, I teach through my actions. I am constantly reading and studying. I own a very successful publishing company and have two non-profits. I’m a dedicated organic gardener. I grow most of my own food. I love people and parties. I have many loving friends. I travel extensively. I also am still painting and taking classes. My life has really become a treasure chest of experiences.
I want to help you create a conscious idea of your later years, to help you realize that these can be the most rewarding years of your life. Know that your future is always bright, no matter what your age. See your later years becoming your treasure years.
Instead of just getting old and giving up and dying, let’s learn to make a huge contribution to life. We have the time, we have the knowledge, and we have the wisdom to move out into the world with love and power.
Step forward, use your voice, get out in the world, and LIVE!
"Deliver me from all evildoers that talk nothing but sickness and failure. Grant me the companionship of men who think success and men who work for it. Loan me associates who cheerfully face the problems of a day and try hard to overcome them. Relieve me of all cynics and critics. Give me good health and the strength to be of real service to the world, and I'll get all that's good for me, and will give what's left to those who want it." - William Feather
From Lessons From My
By Mary Johnson
I’ve been thinking a lot about GRATITUDE lately. Maybe it’s that time of
year – as we approach the holidays. These are the times when we are called to
express thankfulness for our blessings. Or maybe it’s because I just re-read
the book that Floyd and I wrote, Lessons From My
Entitled “The Power of Positive Thanking,” chapter six offers an insightful
lesson about living with a grateful heart. It was a lesson that Zig Ziglar
taught to Floyd Wickman early on in their relationship when he shared,
“Gratitude is the greatest gift God ever gave us.” It’s a way of shaping our
lives and keeping perspective; it’s a way of finding peace.
Over the years, Floyd found ways of living the message he’d gotten from
Zig. Here are three quick tips that will help you live in gratitude. 1. Say “Thank You” a lot. It’s not a popular phrase right
now in our world. In fact, anyone who has been through a grocery checkout line
recently probably heard, “Here you go!” or “Have a nice day!” or perhaps nothing
at all. Expressing our gratitude for service makes you AND them feel better.
It’s polite – in a society that often forgets its manners. And most important:
it brings a smile to those who hear it and say it. And smiles are a powerful
force of good in the world. 2. Give the gift of attention. Our lives are so full and
busy that it can be hard to be “in the present”. We multi-task and rush from
one appointment to another. It slows us down to hold still, look into someone’s
eyes and really listen to what they are saying. Yet that kind of attention
allows us to engage in their lives, to deepen our relationships with those
around us. Practice developing the habit of giving undivided attention to the
people you care about. Or even practice this talent on those you don’t yet
know! 3. Forgive. Carrying around anger and hurt stifles
creativity and joy. It prevents us from living life to the fullest. Harboring
negative feelings hurts ourselves most of all. Forgiving – even those who don’t
deserve it, or haven’t asked for it – cleanses us and opens the gateway to
gratitude. It is a gift we give to ourselves.
When we are aware of all the blessings we have been given, we are better able
to keep our perspective in the face of adversity. Living a grateful life is a
choice, a habit to be formed. It means we stop taking so much for granted.
Count your blessings. How high can you get the number? Choose to live in
gratitude today. Learn
more about the extraordinary lessons Zig Ziglar taught us and how they can
change your life as well!
When we have anger that is lingering, we can give it to the earth to transmute and given a new purpose.
As humans, we all have anger, sometimes more than others. A healthy way of purging our anger from our bodies is to give it to Mother Earth. We can imagine ourselves being grounded as the electrical energy passes from us into Mother Earth below. We can see that energy go straight to the earth’s core where it becomes part of the continuous growth process of our planet and is transformed from negative to positive, from dark to light. When we choose to give our anger to the earth, we trust our connection with the natural world we live in and the great universe that fuels it all. Mother Earth will lovingly transform your anger into light so no need to feel guilty about unloading to her.
We can make this offering of our energy from any location, whether many stories up or on a ship at sea. We know the earth is below us, supporting us and sustaining us. If we have the opportunity to physically connect to the earth by going outdoors and touching unpaved ground, we may find it easier to connect to nature’s energy flow. It may also be easier to receive the flow of positive, calming, healing energy that comes to fill our bodies when we have emptied ourselves of our anger. To begin, sit and breathe deeply, ask Mother Earth to accept your anger, and imagine it coming down your spine out of your tailbone, and into the earth’s deep core. To finish, be sure to honor and thank the earth for her loving service.
When we work with our anger this way, we acknowledge that like everything else it is merely energy that can be used positively or negatively. During our grounding meditation, we may be given direction to channel this energy for its best use. We may find that the earth can help us cleanse misplaced energy to use for its rightful purpose. When we do this with gratitude, we know that we are not misusing the earth for our own selfish purposes. Instead we are connecting ourselves with the energy of our homeland, and when we do this we nurture the earth as it nourishes us.
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!