Sunday, August 31, 2014
Wickman, CSP, CPAE, National Speakers Association Hall of Fame and founder of The Floyd Wickman Program and The Floyd Wickman Team The #1 fact of life in the real estate business today is drama. I believe today’s leaders have to resist the temptation to get caught up in it and focus on the five jobs of a sales manager: recruit, train, direct, motivate and upgrade. “Sure, Floyd, that sounds good in theory,” I hear my friends in leadership say, “but you don’t see the steady parade of agents coming into my office with transaction problems. It’s overwhelming.” Please believe me, I have a lot of empathy with you. I still teach one or two programs a year myself, and I hear it, too. Problems, problems, problems. The experts at NAR and RealTrends agree with what my clients tell me – that the majority of licensed agents are closing between 0 and 3 transactions a year. And I believe this is the source of most of the problems that occur during a transaction. Agents who regularly have at least two closings a month have the systems in place and the training and experience to handle most problems. It’s the untrained co-broke agent without the systems, experience and training that has a tendency to throw the proverbial monkey wrench into the works. Not maliciously, of course. I know, because I was one of them. My first year in real estate I had five transactions, and two fell through. I was the “untrained co-broke.” I wanted desperately for every single one of them to close. I needed them to close. But when a problem came up it felt like the world was coming to an end. In a word – ‘drama’. Once a thread of drama creeps into a transaction, these agents will march into your office, throw the deal down on your desk, and then go into a holding pattern until you fix things for them. Keep your open door policy if it’s something you have promised, but add a few guidelines to help lower the emotional temperature. I call it The Ask The Experts System. I used it to build my speaking career, and we use it in our program, in our coaching, and in our company. When someone comes to you with a problem, ask them to first clarify what their goal is. Of all the possible outcomes, what is most important to them? What is their priority? What do they want to have happen. That’s called taking responsibility for the desired end result. Remember, it’s impossible to achieve a goal you don’t have. They don’t need to go over al the details and the drama. They just need to fill in the blank. “My #1 goal is ________.” Follow that by helping them put into words what they believe is preventing them from achieving that goal. What is the biggest obstacle, problem or challenge? Again, fill in the blank. “My #1 challenge is _________.” Finally, have them ask you, “What is your one best piece of advice?” Getting people to clearly state what they want, and then state what they believe is stopping them, takes the emotion out of most situations, and focuses the discussion on solutions, not drama. You can take it a step further, and get everyone involved together, either face to face or on a conference call, and have each person Ask The Experts. You facilitate. When everyone who has a stake in getting to a closing has a chance to state their goal and their challenge, and ask for advice, you are much more likely to eliminate obstacles, problems and challenges. Best of all, it will dramatically shorten the amount of time it takes to move a shaky transaction forward, and the amount of drama in the air. I hope you enjoy these blog posts and articles enough to share them with your friends and colleagues. And, as always, if there’s ever anything I can do to help your cause, I am only just a phone call or text away. Lisa Ekanger your preferred trainer!
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 4:26 PM
Friday, August 29, 2014
I used to be like you. I used to try to keep my home perfect, my kids perfect, my life perfect. I used to be obsessed with keeping the house clean, the clothes washed, the groceries bought. I used to go to ALL of the school events and work so hard to discover ALL of the opportunities that were available to me, my kids and ALL of us as a family. For a lot of years it worked, and I felt like I was making progress...I felt as though I had accomplished something. I lived that way until I was 40 years old. Then, something happened right around my 40th birthday. I looked in the mirror and said to myself, you can never get those 40 years back. I asked myself, "Were they mostly good?" "Which ones would you repeat if you could?" I took inventory and decided that the best years of my life were spent laughing with friends and family. The best years of my life weren't because of any particular set of circumstances or where I lived, or how much money I made, or what I owned. As the years passed and I collected experiences, I also found myself falling into the expected path. The one that is accepted by our society, by our culture. Married, 2 kids, 1 boy and one girl...a house in the burbs. As the years passed and I had more money and more things, I also observed that my stress level was rising too. I observed less laughter as I reviewed those years of my life. It wasn't easy getting back to me. It was one step forward two steps back for sure. My decision to reclaim me was deliberate and very slow. Now almost 8 years later, I can say I am about 65% of the way to reclaiming me. I pushed down the obsessive thoughts reminding me to clean the house, water the plants and bath the dogs. It took several years to be able to just walk past a mess, go to bed with dishes in the sink and RELAX. I even bought a little sign that hangs prominently in my office, it says RELAX. I asked myself, what am I racing toward? Doing more and more and more for everyone around me just left me more and more and more empty and exhausted. Time for boundaries! I said goodbye to everyone. I said goodbye to my old relationships to people, and set out on a new course. Addressing them one at a time...and reminding myself ALL the way through, "YOU WILL NEVER GET THIS TIME BACK!" I said goodbye to my church, many so called friends, family, and my old marriage. The work isn't complete, as you probably guessed, the hardest changes are the ones that stare you in the face on a daily basis...which makes the marriage improvement one of the very hardest challenges to take on. You might think I've abandoned my responsibilities, you may even think I'm being selfish. I would say to you, "I simply do not care what you think." And I don't mean that in a snotty or bitchy way. I am selfish! Because if I don't take care of me, there will be no me. My positive contributions to the world will be done and I'm not ready to be done! I embarked on this self-improvement around 40, I read about meditation and free-thinking. I practiced yoga and now daily Zen. I never dreamed that by allowing them in, they would park themselves in my heart whether I liked it or not. They bathed my heart in peace and I had no choice but to practice the very thing that flooded me. I am at peace as I approach my 50th milestone. When others attempt to pull me into their drama, I just release the stress. It is not my problem. I didn't create this world. I didn't create the conditions that freak you out. I only can control me and how I react to the things that freak me out! that's ALL. I haven't signed off. I'm more plugged into my presence and my contribution then I have ever been before. My days are long and wonderful and full of life, laughter and meaning. Do I have down moments? Yes. But I don't allow them to linger for very long. I am very good at brooming them away. Instead of cleaning the outside of my world, I am now obsessed with cleaning the inside of my soul. #lifeisgood Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 8:41 AM
Thursday, August 28, 2014
- Think “If he can do it, I can do it.” Turn fear into fuel. Tune out the “I suck” thoughts by creating a new story, which you make true by doing something new. - Create space for the life you want to live and the feelings you want to feel. Even though it might mean giving up the company paycheck and the health insurance. - Change patterns. Take little actions, making those a habit, and building them into something big. Lisa Ekanger !
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 3:21 PM
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
By Madisyn Taylor Learning to accept the things that we perceive as wrong can be a difficult task for many of us. Often we have been brought up to accept that it is normal to feel guilty about our actions and that by doing so we will make everything seem alright within ourselves. Even though we might feel that we have a reason to make up for the choices we have made, it is much more important for us to learn how to deal with them in a healthy and positive way, such as through forgiveness and understanding. When we can look back at our past and really assess what has happened, we begin to realize that there are many dimensions to our actions. While feeling guilty might assuage our feelings at first, it is really only a short-term solution. It is all too ironic that being hard on ourselves is the easy way out. If we truly are able to gaze upon our lives through the lens of compassion, however, we will be able to see that there is much more to what we do and have done than we realize. Perhaps we were simply trying to protect ourselves or others and did the best we could at the time, or maybe we thought we had no other recourse and chose a solution in the heat of the moment. Once we can understand that dwelling in our negative feelings will only make us feel worse, we will come to recognize that it is really only through forgiving ourselves that we can transform our feelings and truly heal any resentment we have about our past. Giving ourselves permission to feel at peace with our past actions is one of the most positive steps we can take toward living a life free from regrets, disappointments, and guilt. The more we are able to remind ourselves that the true path to a peaceful mind and heart is through acceptance of every part of our lives and actions, the more harmony and inner joy we will experience in all aspects of our lives. Lisa Ekanger !
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 5:40 PM
“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind." “Fate is how your life unfolds when you let fear determine your choices. A path of destiny reveals itself to you, however, when you confront your fear and make conscious choices.” “I am convinced that the deepest desire within each of us is to be liberated from the controlling influences of our own psychic madness or patterns of fear. All other things—the disdain of ordinary life, the need to control others rather than be controlled, the craving for material goods as a means of security and protection against the winds of chaos—are external props that serve as substitutes for the real battle, which is the one waged within the individual soul.” -- Caroline Myss Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred Trainer!
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 8:12 AM
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
“To feel ambition and to act upon it is to embrace the unique calling of our souls. Not to act upon that ambition is to turn our backs on ourselves and on the reason for our existence.” "Turning pro is a mindset. If we are struggling with fear, self-sabotage, procrastination, self-doubt, etc., the problem is, we're thinking like amateurs. Amateurs don't show up. Amateurs crap out. Amateurs let adversity defeat them. The pro thinks differently. He shows up, he does his work, he keeps on truckin', no matter what." “The amateur dreads becoming who she really is because she fears that this new person will be judged by others as "different." The tribe will declare us "weird" or "queer" or "crazy." The tribe will reject us. Here's the truth: the tribe doesn't give a shit. There is no tribe. That gang or posse that we imagine is sustaining us by the bonds we share is in fact a conglomeration of individuals who are just as fucked up as we are and just as terrified. Each individual is so caught up in his own bullshit that he doesn't have two seconds to worry about yours or mine, or to reject or diminish us because of it. When we truly understand that the tribe doesn't give a damn, we're free. There is no tribe, and there never was. Our lives are entirely up to us.” - Steven Pressfield Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 5:30 AM
Monday, August 25, 2014
Sunday, August 24, 2014
Love is one of the most powerful forces known to man. Love is very much like water: it's nearly everywhere, it can replenish, it can destroy, it can pour, it can pull you under, it can push you up, it can melt, it can freeze, and it can evaporate for use elsewhere, particularly when it isn't reciprocated. Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 5:20 PM
Friday, August 22, 2014
A little known secret concerning life in the jungles of time and space, is that however far you reach, you will go farther. However great your dreams, they will be grander. And however much you love, you will be loved much more. We call it the Law of Increasing Returns. Love you much more, The Universe Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 6:00 AM
Thursday, August 21, 2014
For all my friends, I never ever do the cut and paste sharing thing. But it just seems to be a period of time where things are hard for everyone. Everyone is going through something. I know that everyone will go through some hard times at some point. Life isn't easy. Just something to think about...did you know the people that are the strongest are usually the most sensitive? Did you know the people who exhibit the most kindness are the first to get mistreated? Did you know the ones who take care of others all the time are usually the ones who need it the most? Did you know the three hardest things to say are I love you, I'm sorry, and Help me? Sometimes just because a person looks happy, you have to look past their smile... To all my friends who are going through some issues right now--let's start an intention avalanche. We all need positive intentions right now. If I don't see your name, I'll understand. May I ask my friends wherever you might be, to kindly copy and paste this status for one hour to give a moment of support to all those who have family problems, health struggles, job issues, worries of any kind and just need to know that someone cares. Do it for all of us, for nobody is immune. I hope to see this on the walls of all my friends just for moral support. I know some will!! I did it for a friend and you can to. Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 3:44 PM
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.” - John Lennon Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 7:19 AM
Monday, August 18, 2014
Our lives can sometimes become status quo and that is ok as long as we aren't keeping it that way on purpose. When our lives are going well, and sometimes even when they aren’t, we may find ourselves feeling very attached to the status quo of our existence--life as we know it. It is a very human tendency to resist change as though it were possible to simply decide not to do it, or have it in our lives. But change will come and the status quo will go, sooner or later, with our consent or without it. We may find at the end of the day that we feel considerably more empowered when we find the courage to ally ourselves with the universal force of change, rather than working against it. Of course, the answer is not to go about changing things at random, without regard to whether they are working or not. There is a time and place for stability and the preservation of what has been gained over time. In fact, the ability to stabilize and preserve what is serving us is part of what helps us to survive and thrive. The problem comes when we become more attached to preserving the status quo than to honoring the universal givens of growth and change. For example, if we allow a situation we are in to remain stagnant simply because we are comfortable, it may be time for us to summon up the courage to challenge the status quo. This may be painful at times, or surprisingly liberating, and it will most likely be a little of both. Underneath the discomfort, we will probably find excitement and energy as we take the risk of unblocking the natural flow of energy in our lives. It is like dismantling a dam inside ourselves, because most of the work involves clearing our own inner obstacles so that the river of our life can flow unobstructed. Once we remove the obstacles, we can simply go with the flow, trusting the changes that follow. Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 5:11 PM
Basically, they think of 100 reasons why something might go wrong. And all of those thoughts then struggle to become things, sometimes overriding their more constructive thoughts. Ain't pretty. But that's the power of worry. Now, let's say you want something fantastic to manifest in your life, Lisa. Hypothetically, let's say you want a sense of self. (I know you.) Have you sat down yet and listed 100 reasons why it might come to you easily, fast, and harmoniously? I think you should. Today works, The Universe Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 11:02 AM
By Mike Pallin, Floyd Wickman Master Trainer and Floyd Wickman Team President “The cheerful readiness to do something.” –Merriam-Webster “A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.” –Rudyard Kipling Browsing the non-fiction section at the local library, I picked up a new book and read the Table Of Contents. One of the chapters was entitled, “How To Persuade People Who Don’t Want To Be Persuaded.” It was the next to last chapter, but the title was so intriguing I had to read it first. The point was you can’t persuade anyone to do anything they aren’t willing to do. Forget talent. Forget ability. Forget skill. Talent is overrated. Ability is inborn. Skill can be learned. Find people who are willing and you can take over the world. Using Floyd’s methods, brokers have recruited thousands of agents by looking for “full-time, career-minded individuals who are willing to work hard and be trained.” That phrase, more than any other, caused more people to raise their hand and say, “Hey, they’re looking for me!” The first year Floyd ran that line ad for real estate recruits he interviewed over 600 candidates. Just by looking for willingness. In The Floyd Wickman Program, hundreds of thousands of salespeople change their lives for the better because they make a commitment up front, which includes that they are “willing to make the mandatory assignments my first priority.” Almost everybody is already busy at start the program. Making this commitment to be willing to put everything else on the back burner until the mandatory assignments are done first, is the very foundation of our guarantee of success. One of the most effective ways to set aside the commission question when it comes up on the phone, (”How much commission do you charge?”) can be found in Floyd’s ‘willing to work’ dialogue. “I’m willing to work for whatever commission you and I can agree on – and that’s usually determined by how much you want to get for your home, and how long you give me to get you that much.” It’s too soon to quote company policy. It’s premature to draw a line in the sand. You don’t even know if you want the listing yet. Handle commission when it’s time to handle commission, and that’s after you’ve agreed to work together. Showing a willingness to be flexible up front will open more doors for you. If I’m looking for a teammate, a partner, a friend, a vendor, an associate, a client, an audience, a student, a mentor, a volunteer, (the list is endless) – I look for willingness first. But I look for the dictionary type of willingness – the “cheerful” kind. Willingness seems to come in two distinct flavors – cheerful, and then every other type. Like the skeptical willingness. The timid willingness. The reluctant willingness. The obligated willingness. The “I’m doing this as a favor to you” willingness. In other words, fake willingness. Cheerful willingness is a character trait I admire, and find very common in the most successful people I know. It is also, coincidentally, a character trait of the most popular people I know. I find anything other than cheerful willingness to be a non-starter. Cheers! Lisa Ekanger Your Floyd Wickman Team Trainer
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 6:42 AM
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
"A day will come when you will be stirred by unexpected events. A part of you will die and you will begin to search for the elixir to bring this part of you back to life. You will seek this elixir in friends, lovers, enemies, books, religions, foreign countries, heroes, songs, rituals, and jobs. But no matter where you look, the treasure will evade you. All will seem lost. You will lose all hope that this magic potion even exists. It will be the darkest of nights, and the promise of certain death will lead you to the abyss of despair. But, staring into this abyss, you will begin to see the dim light of your own illumined soul.Your radiance will transform the abyss itself into the elusive elixir of life. And for the first time you will realize that all the while . . . it was your own Light that you were searching for." Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 1:02 PM
Monday, August 11, 2014
Sometimes our lives are so busy that we treat our homes as if they were impersonal places that we merely pass through. But we can make certain that our homes truly feel like our sanctuaries by taking the time to tend to them like gardens, which need care in order to offer us the beauty of their blooms. When we take the time to treat our homes like beloved treasures, we can shift their energy from being merely places to being wellsprings for the replenishment of our energy. Consider that homes are the outer reflections of those who live within. If we feel that the current appearance clashes with how we’d like to see ourselves, it can keep us from fully allowing our light to shine. Updating our homes to reflect our inner landscape need not involve massive redecorating or a large outlay of money. Small things can make a big difference, like simply moving items so that we constantly gaze upon the things we love the most, liberating the treasures we’ve hidden in our closets, using our best dishes and making small repairs. Organizing and cleaning is a no-cost way to remove chaos from our homes and introduce more calm. Lovingly rejuvenating our personal space can become a creative project that increases the flow of good throughout all aspects of our lives and increases our feeling of connection. We can give old things new life by donating them to charity, opening space for newness to enter. Removing stress from our homes can be as simple as putting o! ur bills into pretty boxes and choosing a specific time to deal with them, or removing clutter so that we and our energy can move freely throughout our space. Simplifying our space lets our imagination and energy roam free. We can choose to prioritize our homes, making them the true heart of our family’s activities. Then we are free to focus on what really matters—time to ourselves, to share with loved ones, and to replenish our energy so that we have more to share with each other and with the world. Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 6:21 PM
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
From Mastin to You, Lisa Ekanger It’s impossible to live the life you truly want to live without being in tune with what you truly want and desire. The truth is that your capacity to create an amazing life is unlimited. You can create any life you want. One of the major blocks to that is what other (many times well intended) people say. And how you allow what other people say to determine the outcome of your life. Your dreams are waiting for you to believe in yourself. Let’s take a massive step forward today. Lisa, your needs are worthy of being met, and it's okay for you to ask for what you want. Life supports you as you choose yourself. Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred FWT Trainer
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 9:33 AM
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
I was greeted by a dark heavy cloak of rain...impossibly dreary my dear, and it was only slightly darker than my mood. Today I will summon the fortitude of a lifetime of warrior skill and mindset to employ BOTH mental and emotional tenacity. Today I will walk around the empty place that was created by me for you. A place in my heart that only the ages will understand and record. The story is timeless...the story is the same one for those who love deeply, openly and un regrettably... but through time all players discover the exact same result... what used to be whole ---a whole beating heart ---is now a quivering and fragile instrument. I don't know this path that I set out on; I cannot see the obstacles that will appear ..but in the corner of my weakened heart...a shiny example is permanently scored there. One of deep understanding, of trust, of beauty, laughter and childish ways. And for that my friend I must thank you; for that I must pull hard and deep on the reserves of gratitude and feel lucky because it was you who entered there. Lisa Ekanger
Posted by Lisa Ekanger at 8:37 AM