Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Yeah, I used to think this kind of talk was kind of fluffy BS, too.

Good morning from New York City!

Often in life as we chase our dreams, we come up against blocks. In fact, it's almost guaranteed that you will come up against ALL KINDS of blocks on your way to creating the life that your Soul yearns for.

One of the biggest I have seen is this idea of permission.
So many people I know and clients that I work with seem to be waiting around for someone else's permission or approval to live their dreams. It's kind of crazy actually.

One piece of dream advice that I heard recently is the idea of doing what you would do with your life if your parents or loved ones were no longer living. Are there any actions you would take? Any dreams you would chase? Parental approval is a big deal. But the thing is, our parents gave birth to us so that we could THRIVE living our dreams. I don't think anyone's highest Self wants us to live someone else's life.

We were not born to live our parents' life. We were not born to live a life of someone else. You were not born to live the life of your tribe, or community, or faith, or creed or nationality. Out beyond all those identifies of FORM is YOU. And YOU are a UNIQUE creation that was born to give a UNIQUE gift.

Yeah, I used to think this kind of talk was kind of fluffy BS, too. But I have made my life an experiment in wondering if that was true ever since I heard it. Sure, there are other inspiring blogs out there, sure, there are other writers (and my space in particular is FLOODED with content and people), and sure there are other email newsletters out there. But I know that there is only ONE me. And that CANNOT be replicated, duplicated, copied or decoded. I am uniquely me.

I don't want to be the "next" so and so. I am the first and last Mastin Kipp. And the SAME is true for you. And I need NO ONE's approval to do what I am doing. What I do comes from a deep calling within myself to WRITE every day. To put out content. To share. To add value. To help people get unstuck and living on purpose.

It's not something I did with a business plan or profitability in mind. It's something I do because I can't not do it. And I choose to do it. And some people like it and some people don't. But all that doesn't matter because in my life, at the end of the day, I have to live with the choices that I make. They are mine to make, no one else's.

And the same is true for you!

So whose approval or permission do you think you need to live your dreams? Make a list. And then realize that the only person's approval or permission you need is your own. Give yourself permission to live your calling, your purpose and your dream. The Divine gave it to you to express in this lifetime. Giving yourself permission to be yourself is the best way to let The Divine guide your life - because that's why It created you.

As always, the action happens over on the BLOG. Head on over there and leave a comment on my blog "Change happens SLOWLY, not all at onles ce!" and join in the conversation! The TDL Community thrives in the comments and it's a GREAT place to get support!


Love,
Mastin

Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Monday, October 29, 2012

I Should Take The Safe Job Or Do What I Love?


It’s a question millions of people around the world struggle with. When I was first starting my career, I wrestled this hairy beast, too.
Safe job vs. DREAM job.
Do you take the “sure thing” that’s going to pay the bills, or do you take a leap of faith and follow that small voice inside that has a direct line to your heart.
This is an important issue to me because I envision a world where every human being is doing work that is meaningful and rewarding.
Click play and hear my advice to Patrick, who is going through this exact struggle of safe job vs. dream job right now.

Marie's Tweetable: People rarely succeed at anything unless they have fun doing it. -Dale Carnegie via @MarieForleo
Not long ago, Josh and I were discussing this very issue as it relates to my step-son.
In his first year of college he was feeling stressed over not “knowing” what he should do for the rest of his life.
Isn’t it strange that we spend so much time in school, and yet we’re never taught how to “figure out” what we should be when we grow up?
Similarly, we’re never given training on how to get what we want once we do know. I’d love to hear your take on this safe job vs. dream job topic in the comments below.
With love,
Marie
~Content originally from marieforleo.com~

Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Happy Halloween!


Happy Halloween From:Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred Realtor!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Every single person you have a relationship with (and I don’t just mean romantically) is a soul mate because they are teaching your soul lessons.

By C Hassler
Have you ever met someone who you hit it off so well right from the start, you were sure they were the “one?” And then it ended. And you were not only heartbroken, but shocked because it seemed so right and you don’t understand what went wrong?
What I have seen over and over again with clients is that they meet someone who has all the qualities that they have dreamed about and they are so happy when they are with that person. And then the person goes away – and sometimes in dramatic, uncontrollable or unchangeable circumstances: abrupt break-ups for no known reason, people all of a sudden being deported, coming out of the closet, being transferred to another city suddenly and so on. It almost feels like the person is literally being pulled away. Well they kind of are – and for a good reason, even if it doesn’t feel like it.
Why does a relationship that feels so right end? So that you can truly see what is so amazingly “right” about you.
I’ll explain…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJgXVJ3shsQ&feature=youtu.be
First, no one is the “one” because everyone is the one. Every single person you have a relationship with (and I don’t just mean romantically) is a soul mate because they are teaching your soul lessons. We all are mirrors and teachers for each other to learn our life curriculum. Next, just as people are here to teach us where we have judgments and unresolved issues, they are also here to illuminate what is so amazing about ourselves that we are not acknowledging, owning and experiencing.
If you have been with someone you thought was the one, you probably found certain qualities about him or her incredibly attractive. You also may have said, “He brought out the best in me!” Exactly. He or she did bring out the best of you, but it’s YOUR job to keep it going. They fulfilled their spiritual agreement with you by attracting you with their awesome qualities to reflect to you what you are not seeing about yourself. And by triggering the best inside of you so you could have the experience of your awesomeness. But it wasn’t their job to stay.
Often the Uni-verse “reassigns” a person to support you in fully integrating what they were reflecting and/or catalyzing inside of you (and protects you from a co-dependent relationship). For example, if you were really attracted to their confidence and drive, one of their gifts to you was to inspire you to reconnect with your confidence and drive. We cannot see in another what we don't have inside ourselves. If you feel like the person brought out a quality of yours like creativity, you are incorrect. They merely triggered what has been dormant inside of you. No one else can make us anything that we aren’t already.
If the person was still there, you would not be motivated to be the things you miss about them. If the person had stayed, you would have always attributed the best you that you felt around to them instead of you.
I understand that nothing feels quite as devastating as not being able to be with the one you thought was the “one.” But this is just short-term devastation. What would be devastating long-term is never truly integrating the amazing qualities you saw or experienced.
Remember, the purpose of any relationship is for our learning and evolution. It is not to be together forever, make us happy, or fulfill any void in our lives (despite what the romantic comedies like to sell us on). I encourage you to move through the pain and get to the PURPOSE of your relationship. Begin to see how it served you.
Trust that even though the physical presence of a person may not be there, the qualities you loved about them belong to YOU. What you love about them are inside YOU. You can never lose them.
You bring out the best in you. It’s there. Stop looking for it in the eyes or arms of another. And when you bring out the best in you – then you will be able to share it with someone who brings out the best in themselves, too. And instead of having the kind of relationship where two people are looking at each other and wondering “are you the one?”, you will both be your best selves looking in same one direction.
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Turn Rejection Into A Stepping Stone!

By C Sssaad
Let’s face it, rejection hurts. Missing out on an opportunity is disappointing. Not getting what we want in life sucks. Coming face to face with our lack of control over our circumstances is confronting. We’ve all been there, and it’s in those moments when relationships, work and life circumstances don’t go as planned or hoped that we have a golden opportunity to grow and claim our power.
So many of us hear the word "No" and we fall deep into the pits of despair. It’s natural to take rejection personally, whether it’s in matters of the heart or in the pursuit of our dreams. And yet this is so often what keeps us from reaching our intended destination. Rather than dusting ourselves off and keeping on keeping on, we tend to get stuck in the rejection, going into all sorts of disempowering interpretations of what it means about us.
I used to be a professional at this. Since I left the certain path of a career in law to partake of the circus that is the music business, I’ve had plenty of people tell me that I didn’t have what they were looking for. I’ve gotten excited about possible opportunities many times, sure that it was going to be my moment, that my break had come, only to find out that I didn’t get the gig or make the cut. There was a time when every instance of this was like a massive death blow to my spirit and my belief in what I was doing. Doubts would surface with a vengeance, my deepest insecurities would roar and I would seriously question if I was really meant to do what I was doing, despite a deeper knowing in my heart and soul that I was right on course.
After a good while of this self-inflicted torture, I came to a breaking point. It was clear that I had to choose between going down a different path to avoid the uncertainty and emotional volatility that came with it, or that I would have to approach things with a radically different mindset.
Despite all the ups and downs and the many challenges along the way, I was clear that I wasn’t ready to give up on my dreams. So instead, I made a decision that I was going to do what I love to do for the love of it and let the rest take care of itself. I resolved to love myself enough to not question my worth at every bump in the road. And I reminded myself that every great success has been preceded by many so-called failures, that it is the journey that matters most - not the destination, and that so many have given up right as they approached the doorstep to the kingdom they had been seeking along. Rather than using all these challenges as evidence of my unworthiness or that my dreams weren’t going to pan out, I would choose to see that I was being shaped and molded so that I could truly be ready when my time came.
It sounds simple but that doesn’t mean it’s been easy. And the truth is, if it was so easy, we’d probably get bored and move on. Not only that, but the really juicy stuff of life – the amazing relationship, the purpose-filled career, the creative mastery that we dream of and aspire to – have to be earned. And the way that we earn it is by using the rejections, failures and challenges along the way as stepping stones, rather than allowing them to become stumbling blocks. We earn it by being so resolute in our willingness to keep going and so committed to our vision and our goals that we stop at nothing to realize them. We may go through ten “wrong relationships” before we find the one that lasts a lifetime. We may hear a hundred “No’s” before we finally hear the “YES” that changes everything. The important thing is to remember that it’s all part of the growing process and that each experience is an indispensable piece of the final puzzle.
A huge part of this is in how we choose to look at the rejections, the failures, the break-ups, the setbacks and the missed opportunities. In those moments when it seems like our will is being thwarted, it’s crucial that we root ourselves deeply in our faith, that we affirm our own worth and that we remind ourselves that there is a Divine plan of goodness for each of us and that at all times and in all circumstances, we are accounted for. And that includes our dreams and our highest good. In fact, especially where those are concerned.
So where in your life can you choose to give a new meaning to rejection, failure or a setback and turn it into a stepping stone? Where can you see the Grace and Divine plan at work in your life and on your Path?

Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Action is the Juice of Life!

By Mastin Kipp:
 
ACTION is where the juice of life is. That means - DOING SOMETHING. Saying "I love you", or committing to saying no, or exercising and eating right, adding more value to the world, getting off your butt and actually doing SOMETHING!

ACTION is the bridge between dreams and reality. Yesterday I talked about change happening slowly. It does.

The key is in the action.


The crazy thing is that sometimes the only action we can take is the choice to not take action. Sometimes we have a waiting period. A time where we are supposed to be confused, we are supposed to incubate. And other times when we are supposed to work our butts off. The clue is to tune in and listen to The Uni-verse. What's being whispered to you in your meditations and what are you intuitively feeling about what is next?

So many seekers block their own natural intuition because they are afraid. And they don't take action. They don't leave the job, or the relationship or start their own business. They don't leap into the arms of The Divine with the trust that they will be caught or learn how to fly. They block their intuition and then life shuts down.

Other times, we take too much action and run around like a chicken with our head cut off. And this is because we are not listening.

The key is to learn how to trust yourself. And whatever you are being told what to do, whatever you are being guided to do, to have the courage to do it. OR if you are being guided to rest, to stop and to wait - to have the willingness and humility to LISTEN and trust what you hear.


If we don't trust ourselves, we will never create the life of our dreams. We will never self-actualize and we will always live a life that is in service to the opinions and beliefs of OTHER PEOPLE. This is NOT our destiny. Our destiny is to live a Self-Approved life in harmony with The Uni-verse where we claim our Divine birthright and ACT on our faith - every day. And as we do, expect and allow miracles and synchronicities to show up in the most amazing way!
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

You are the COO (the chief operating officer) of your life.

I recently attended an event hosted by Goldman Sachs celebrating small businesses and entrepreneurs. The event consisted of a panel of successful business people who dished out some great advice for business – which I found totally applicable to life. If you treated your life and your growth as an investment, just like you would a business, imagine the internal (and consequently external) success you would have.
Here are the top tips they shared along with my suggestions on how you translate this advice to the business of YOU.
  1. Immerse yourself in learning. This is pretty obvious – the more you learn new things, the more equipped you are to let go and outgrow old patterns, beliefs and behaviors that aren’t serving you.
  2. Work on your business instead of in it. When working on yourself, remember to be in a place of neutral observation and see yourself with some perspective instead of intense judgment. When you are too “in it”, meaning you are indulging in your story, it is impossible to get the altitude you need to create the shifts you want.
  3. There will be adversity - you may do everything perfect and it has nothing to do with you. How we learn is through challenge and contrast. Nobody gets the greatest cards all the time but we can do the greatest things with any hand we are dealt. You are always doing the best you can and don’t take things personally!
  4. Get pumped up but not delusional. It is awesome to get excited about your life and dreams. Just avoid traveling to fantasyland by placing unrealistic expectations on others or jumping to conclusions before you have information. And don’t buy into the number one delusion of them all: that anyone or anything outside of you can fulfill you.
  5. How you will be judged is how you respond to adversity. The Uni-verse doesn't judge you but on some level we could say that we’re “evaluated” on how well we are learning our life lessons by the way we respond to them. The more we respond with acceptance and a willingness to choose love over fear, the more we attract what is more in alignment with who we truly are and what we truly want.
  6. Listen to advice and implement it so your business grows. It’s one thing to gather a lot of advice and guidance; it’s another thing to implement it. Awareness isn’t enough – integration is when major growth happens.
  7. Don’t do it all on your own. Knowing when and whom to ask for help is critical for your success and over all well-being. No one does it alone.
  8. Have a sense of optimism. Anything in the future we are making up so when you look ahead, make it good. Worry and pessimism is the imagination used poorly. Expect and TRUST that everything is and will happen for your Highest Good.
You are the COO (the chief operating officer) of your life. You cannot control what happens, but you have total dominion over how you respond to what happens. You are a co-creator and have the number one biggest influence on the business of you. And the Uni-verse is your CEO (the chief executive officer) who makes all the master calls and always has your back.
Love,
Christine
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Monday, October 15, 2012

November will bring you the most GROUNDED, ACTIONABLE wisdom !

That is why I am SUPER excited to tell you about The Daily Love EXTRAVAGANZA! It's a worldwide online event that for five nights in November will bring you the most GROUNDED, ACTIONABLE wisdom from today's leading transformational voices and all for FREE!




The Daily Love is the #1 online destination for grounded, actionable wisdom on the internet and I've curated curated over 20 new generation transformational voices to rock your world and inspire your soul. Also, I've assembled some fantastic "leadership" interviews with the most trusted names in personal development.

All FREE!
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Thursday, October 11, 2012

The Power of I AM!

Each and every day, we proclaim what and who we are - sometimes without realizing it. Almost as if we're on auto-pilot, we tell the world around us what we think about ourselves. We often undervalue the power of our thoughts and forget that. This morning I made a quick stop at Starbucks in between training my amazing clients near the beach (I love my job!), and I overheard a few conversations.
A guy was talking to a very lovely woman as they both waited in line behind me. He got her attention by saying, "Hey, I am SO bad with names but I feel like we've met before."
I thought, "His story of 'I am SO bad with names' makes him struggle with remembering names." He said it with such conviction and he believed that to be factual. So he more than likely believes that he will have a difficulty remembering the name of most people he meets, even before he meets them. Either that or he was digging into his bag of "pick up lines."
As I approached the counter to order, one of the baristas knocked over two tall stacks of cups. They plummeted all over the counter and went flying in every possible direction. Patrons and dedicated coffee drinkers stopped their small talk to see what caused such commotion. The barista exclaimed, "I am SUCH an idiot! So sorry everyone. I am so clumsy."
As I helped gather the flying to-go coffee cups, I said, "You're not an idiot OR clumsy. You're human. You're also an awesome barista and no one can make my Americano better than you can. I'm grateful for you."
"No I am so stupid. Can't believe I just did that," she argued.
"Anything you say after 'I am' is true, so choose a better-feeling adjective," I argued back.
She was having a really hard time saying anything positive after "I am", but she finally announced that she was awesome by the time I paid for my coffee. We feel like it's challenging or awkward to celebrate ourselves, but it's the fastest and easiest way to undo our negative thinking. We make it paramount and difficult to change our thought pattern, because we think we're being honest with ourselves. But it's actually our Ego trying to keep our authentic Self small and quiet.
Tell your Ego, "Thanks for your opinion, but you can just keep that to yourself. I am AMAZING! Byyyyye!!!"
All you have to do is make the choice to make the change. Since you're the boss of you, you get to decide that you're going to stop the negative mental chatter and say something nice to your Self - out loud! It INSTANTLY feels better than ANY negative thought you were just having. Then you get to pay your Self another great compliment. And another, and another and another!
You simply cannot give your Self too many compliments. You just can't. In this exact moment, say something FANTASTIC about the beautiful being that you are. Just do it! I'm pretty sure you smiled while saying it, didn't you? :)
One of my most favorite spiritual teachers of all time, summed it all up when he said:

The guy knew what he was talking about. Celebrate your Self each and every day. Be mindful of whatever you say after "I AM", because your body - and the Uni-verse - will most certainly believe you.
Love all that is you,
xoxo
Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred Realtor!

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

7 Myths About Finding Your Calling

In the process of experiencing this for myself and guiding my mentoring clients through similar journeys, I’ve realized that there’s a whole mythology around what it means to find your calling, and most of it is total hogwash.

So let me bust a few myths for you, just in case you’re feeling like bug soup these days.

Seven Myths About Finding Your Calling Dr Lissa Rankin

Myth #1: Callings Come with Business Plans
This is horse manure. I could never have written a business plan for the way in which I’m called to serve on this planet. All you can do is follow the hot tracks one step at a time, each time getting closer and closer, honing in on your purpose until everything in your being says “YES!” (Usually followed closely by “Hell no!” Don’t worry. That phase is temporary.)
Myth #2: You Only Get One Calling
Nope. Sometimes callings show up with expiration dates. You do what you’re here to do. You complete it. And then you’re called to do something else.
Myth #3: Only Chosen People Have Callings
If you think callings are a luxury reserved for Divinely chosen, extraordinary people, you’re totally off base. Well, sort of. The reality is that every single one of us is a Divinely chosen, extraordinary person with a calling just waiting to be fulfilled. Own it. Claim yours. The planet needs you desperately.
Myth #4: Callings Must Come with Paychecks
Some people are called to be stay-at-home moms. Others are called to volunteer to do food distribution at a refugee camp in Africa. You don’t have to get paid for fulfilling your calling. (Though it sure is nice when you are!)
Myth #5: If You’re Following Your Calling, Life Is Easy All the Time
You don’t want to be going upstream, but even if you’re flowing downstream, you’re still likely to hit some rapids. Finding your calling definitely leaves you feeling like you’re in the flow more often than not, but that doesn’t mean you won’t hit your rough patches. If anything, the challenges just reaffirm your commitment to fulfilling what you’re called to do, reminding you how much what you’re doing matters.
Myth #6: Finding Your Calling Means You Have to Quit Your Stable Job
Sometimes finding your calling requires you to take a leap of faith and quit the job that isn’t your calling. But callings aren’t all or nothing. There’s no reason you can’t pay the bills with a stable job that doesn’t necessarily light your fire while fulfilling your calling on the side.
Myth #7: You Must Have a Breakdown to Find Your Calling
For many, a breakdown precedes a breakthrough. But it doesn’t have to be that way if you’re listening to whispers from the Universe. You don’t have to wait for the proverbial 2 x 4 to thwack you upside the head. I was sound asleep before finding my calling, so I needed my Perfect Storm to blow through and shake me out of my complacency. But you don’t have to wait for the Universe to smack you. You can voluntarily leap out of your comfort zone and into your calling, if you’re self-aware and brave enough to do so. (More power to ya if you are!)
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

...But you must first be willing to risk it all.

"Get on with your own creative life. Ideas are free. They don't cost you a thing. You can live in the world of thought all the days of your life and never go broke.

You will also die unfulfilled, because an idea that never incarnates, that never becomes physical and grounded in this world, will eventually feel like the most painful burden you ever had to carry - one that you can never put down.


People who have had near death experiences report that there is indeed a life review that happens upon our death, and that a part of that life review is to make note of what could have been in our lives had we chose otherwise.

Falling into that category are all the creative opportunities the universe provided for us that we let fall by the wayside because our fears carried more authority within us than our faith.

Trust in the life support system that is inherent in your creative spirit. You will draw to yourself all that you need as you need it, but you must first be willing to risk it all."

- Caroline Myss

Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Monday, October 8, 2012

9 Steps to really love yourself ~ By Louise Hay


1)   Stop all critisicm ...never criticize yourself again ~ abolish it.  Come from a place of being OK as you are and you can make changes.  Criticism never changes a thing.  Change happens, but if you criticize, then you are sealing that which is only negative change. Make a vow and do it, to stop it.

2) Dont scare yourself.  Be there for yourself.  How often do we lie in bed creating the worst possible scenario for ourselves?  Dont go immediately to catastrophic thinking.  Frightening thoughts are negative affirmations. Pick a nice switch to image, and when the negative thought comes up say Im not going to think about that and immediately switch to the beautiful image.

3) Be gentle and kind and patient with yourself. What kind of garden do you want to grow?  What kind of planting of seeds (thoughts) do you want to plant?  One day you will reap the bountiful harvest of the garden (life) you imagined for yourself.  Watch for the weeds, the weeds are the old negative thoughts...pluck them out as soon as they come up!  Treat yourself as you would treat a gentle little child.

4) Be kind to your mind. Self hatred is really only hating thoughts you have about yourself. You are worth loving. You dont have to earn love. You have the right to be loved because you exist. Words and thoughts are shaping our future. Doing affirmations is one of the best ways to be kind to your mind. Think of your thoughts as building you up, not beating you up.  Blame creates guilt, and guilt  always creates punishment and punishment creates pain. Relax allow healing energy in.

5) Praise yourself. Criticism breaks the spirit, praise builds it up. Allow yourself to accept good in your life whether you believe you deserve it or not. What do you want that youre not now having? What did the laws of your childhood tell you what you deserve ...did you always have to earn what you deserve?  What are the beliefs that are in the way of you really deserving.  What do you have to live for? What is your purpose? What are you willing to do to experience the good you deserve?

6) Support youself. Reach out to friends and allow them to support you. Mirror work is important. Look in the mirror and say ,"I love you, I really really love you." Then say, What can I do for your today to make you happy? Events come and go, but the love you have for yourself is constant! We are too hard on ousrselves. Look at yourself and say, "I forgive you." Talk to other people in the mirror, say all sorts of things you would be afraid to say otherwise.

7) Being loving to your negatives.  You created negatives to fill a need...and at one time they worked.  Now you can choose to let go of the old negative pattern and choose something different.  If you run around saying, "I hate my job." Then you get a new job, realize that soon after you will hate your new job too.  You sent a message to the universe, and the universe listens.  Our thoughts and our words are powerful.  You are never wrong, you are doing the best you can until you find another way to do it. Laughter is healing.

8) Take care of your body, its the house you live in.  Love the house you live in.  Watch what you put into your body. Drugs and overeating eventually alter your reality. Food and drugs are used as an escape to facing our feelings.  Feel your feelings, they pass through, they dont stay. Learning about nutrition is an act of loving ourselves. Start noticing what gives you good energy, and what tears you down.

9) My beliefs affirmations:
I believe that I am always safe. 
I am lead and guided at every moment. 
Whatever I need to know, it is revealed to me. 
I dont have to struggle to find information, if Im meant to know something, it comes to me. 
I release the struggle of trying to make things happen, I use flow to create positive progress.
I put my concerns and wishes out into the universe and the answers are revealed in the perfect time space & sequence.
Life is a joy and filled with love ~ as I choose to believe this, it comes true for me.   
Im loving and I am loved. I prosper wherever I turn. 
I never go for money, I always ask, "How can I help".
My income is constantly increasing.
I am willing to grow and change.
Im willing to let go of what doesnt work for me anymore. 
All is well in my world.


Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred Realtor!

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Whats Your Definition of Success?

In today’s world, and especially in Western Society, we place a great deal of value on the idea of “success” and being “successful” in whatever we choose to do in our lives. The desire to be successful is the driving force behind a great deal of what we do and for most of us, it dictates the course we choose for our entire lives and also how we live from day to day.
Definitions of what success looks like and what it means to be successful are completely subjective and vary from one field to the next, from one community to the next and even from one individual to the next. Each of us can define for ourselves what success really looks like and yet many of us have unconsciously inherited someone else’s definition of what it is and as a result, we end up living in pursuit of some illusory unattainable goal or a life that we don’t really want.
In my family, and even in my larger ethnic community, a successful career is defined as one with a solid job in one of the professions such as being a doctor, dentist or lawyer and a successful life means getting married, buying a house and having kids by the time your thirty. When I was in my mid-twenties, I was well on my way to living out this life. I was about to graduate from law school with a coveted job lined up at a big corporate law firm and I was in a relationship with my first real love and I was sure that we were going to get married and go the distance, much to my family’s delight.
At the same time, my somewhat newly discovered passion for music was growing stronger every day and there was this undeniable voice within me that kept telling me that I was destined for something more. Not that there was anything wrong with a legal career or the path I was traveling, but deep down inside, I knew I wasn’t going to be fulfilled by that work and if I denied the creative yearning that was growing stronger and stronger.
Coming face to face with this truth and acting on it was one of the most difficult choices I’ve ever had to make. It required me to question everything I knew and was taught to believe about how I was supposed to live my life. It required me to have some extremely challenging conversations with my parents explaining why I couldn’t keep going on the path that we had “agreed” I was going to take with my life. In the midst of all the soul-searching and changing direction, the relationship I was so certain about ended, leaving me with no semblance of the life I was on course towards establishing and with no choice but to take one massive leap of faith.
And that’s what I did…I kindly declined the big job offer. I held my ground with my family and my community and I went for it! I’ve been actively engaged in the practice of my crafts and in the business of music ever since. More recently, I’ve also been working with TDL, providing one-on-one mentoring to our amazing clients to empower them to live the life of their dreams – an opportunity that only came as a result of me creating space in my life by letting go of what I knew I didn’t want. Since that first leap about five years ago, it’s been one crazy rollercoaster ride, but I haven’t experienced one ounce of regret because I know in my heart that I’m on the path that I was born to walk. I’m living a life that’s in alignment with my purpose of spreading peace, love and inspiration by expressing my creativity and I’m doing what lights me up with the intent to serve and make a difference. And that feels good!
There are still those occasional tough conversations with my family and with others who don’t always quite “get it” and who can’t wrap their heads around the choices I’ve made. What I’ve learned is to be so solid in my resolve and so confident in the rightness of my choices for me that I don’t get rattled by those conversations and the opinions of others.
I’ve also learned to separate my desire to be loved and belong with the need to get approval or follow the herd. In other words, you don’t have to be like them to be one of them. And you don’t have to live for their definition of success to get their love. And if you do, that’s not real love anyways, so you might as well do what’s going to make you happy.
The more we can let go of the need for anyone else’s approval in how we live our lives, the more freedom we have to really go for the life we dream of. The more we realize that we don’t need anyone’s permission but our own, the more empowered we will be in CHOOSING the path that our soul is leading us towards and the more fully we can embrace the life we desire and our own definition of success.
For me, being successful means being fulfilled in what I do, it means being fully expressed creatively, and it means loving and accepting myself enough that I can be a source of love and inspiration to others.
What about you? What’s your definition of success? Perhaps you’ve been living for someone else’s approval or according to their version of what your life should be. Are you willing to step up and step out onto the path that you really want to walk? Are you ready to define your own success?
Much love,
Chris
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Friday, October 5, 2012

But wait………….this is where the ah-ha moment comes in!

We all know what it feels like when a light bulb finally goes off inside our heads or hearts. Sometimes we don’t even know the bulb is there, waiting for us to turn it on. For most of us, we turn on these lights, thereby experiencing what we call ‘ah-ha’ moments, only occasionally. For a few of us luckier ones, we experience these moments regularly throughout our lives. I want to share such a moment I recently had with the hopes that some of you will resonate with my experience.

I have always been comfortable being an average achiever. My comfort zone was being a solid C student. Throughout various professional endeavors I never really reached my full potential, with notable exceptions, because I didn’t apply myself. A weird sort of apathy would overcome me pulling me away from my real goal. Rather than fight this pull, I acquiesced, taking the low road of least resistance and settling for okay.

In personal relationships, being an extrovert, I tend to be open with most people right from our first meeting. This draws people in to a comfortable yet personal zone. Then suddenly I instinctively put up a wall, which few people go beyond. This wall pops up once an emotional bond emerges. I suddenly become an introvert.

Experiences throughout my childhood echoed this dynamic of extrovert and introvert. My early memories are mired in images of positive and negative reinforcement. This is how we grow into adulthood. In my case, I soon discovered that negative reinforcement (punishment) soon groomed me to excel to a certain level of competence quickly, but not to exceed another certain level just slightly higher. This balance was what I have fondly referred to as a Solid C. So firmly embedded was this thin spectrum that I am still stuck there.

But wait………….this is where the ah-ha moment comes in! I had never been aware of what is commonly referred to as a glass ceiling. I did not realize that I had the ability to break through this ceiling and propel myself to higher levels as I choose. I had not realized that what was holding me back was a simple fear of leaving the old trench. But even more basically, I had not known there was something I could actually put my finger on that would have triggered such a dynamic! As with all ah-ha moments, this awareness cannot and will not suddenly disappear. It stays with us forever and it feels wonderful each time we think of it.

If you find that you are stuck in a trench like I was, try looking up. Perhaps there’s glass ceiling there. Was there a time in your childhood when you did something to the very best of your ability, yet received negative reinforcement? I’ll give you an example. Remember when we learned to write in cursive during the second grade? I can picture the lineup of the alphabet in both lower and upper cases. Enter the letter ‘Q’, which can clearly resemble the numeral ‘2’ in some written styles. When I was explaining to my mother how excited I was to be learning about writing and how different some of the letters she scribed were different from the ones at school. I was puzzled (not being a smart ass - I had given that up years earlier) because my inquisitiveness was viewed by her as being argumentative. As a result my reward was to transcribe, in perfect penmanship, a full page per day from a book for the entire summer. This was going to teach me how to write and not to argue. I already knew how to write and I was incensed. Instantaneously my inquisitiveness was extinguished. Solid ‘C’ was born!

So powerful was this ‘I’ll show him’ lesson that I stopped reading all books and my assignments………….forever! I never read one single book in school, nor did I ever check a book out of the library, not even in college.

Thankfully I was blessed with a keen observational mind and I managed to get through school and gain an excellent education by paying careful attention in class. Never did I miss a class and I learned to express my thoughts well in writing, when absolutely necessary. What had happened was a glass ceiling had emerged. Once I became aware of what dynamic was involved here, I began to change things.

Throughout my life there were other key moments which surfaced from time to time to remind me of the events that elicited a cellular emotional response, which so clearly defined and maintained my status as Solid ‘C’.

I hope you all find deep within you the events that have limited you. To some people, this is a new concept. You may experience some fear about delving into your memories for these uncomfortable moments. This is natural and a sign of mental health. One might wonder what one needs to do next. Simply be aware of what has been limiting you from reaching for the stars. The universe will care of the rest. Follow your heart.
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

TGIF ~ Friends:-)


Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Get Out of Your Own Way!

The most affirmation is not to decree what you want.
Sometimes what you want is actually not what you REALLY want, but what you think you want based on who you think you currently are. And who you are is always evolving and expanding.
The most powerful prayer is simply to SURRENDER. To give up what you think your goal and vision should look like, to give up your attachments to the form, and to open yourself to the highest good unfolding for all concerned.
When you surrender what you think should be, you open to a higher flow of GRACE. You tap into the Uni-verse itself, and IT knows exactly how to bring about the most authentic fulfillment of your dreams and destiny.
The mind is limited. Your personality is limited. In any given moment you can only see part of the picture. Surrender moves you beyond the mind, and into a stream of magic, synchronicity and miracles.
Then you will be carried on the wings of Grace towards your perfect destiny. It may not look like what you thought, but know that what The Uni-verse has in store for you is often much bigger than your mind can ever imagine or conceive.
Surrender does not mean giving up in the typical sense. However, it does mean giving UP the limited view point of what and how you thought things should be so that things can expand into the Divine VASTNESS of what they are truly meant to be for your highest good.
It requires a deep trust in Life. You can either trust your mind, which constantly sells you all sorts of B.S. all day long. Or you can trust The Uni-verse's Intelligence that is not only living and breathing you right now, but synchronizing all of life itself.

So when things don't work out how you wanted them to, rather than collapse into despair, trust that the The Uni-verse has something bigger, better, and brighter in store for you than what you originally thought.
That is the time to get curious to see what is about to happen. And watch the magic of The Uni-verse unfold.
Sometimes we get afraid or overwhelmed as we think about HOW to bring our goal into reality. It can trigger fear, questioning, doubt.
The illusion is that YOU need to manifest your vision. Inherent in your authentic dream are already the seeds for it's fulfillment. Your role is not to struggle or force anything. Your role is to simply GET YOURSELF OUT OF THE WAY so that The Uni-verse can flow through you and manifest itself as your vision in your life.
Then things are effortless, since it's not really you DOING it.
You are then in the flow, simply showing up, participating 100% and witnessing the miraculousness of The Uni-verse at work in your life.
Love.Now
Kute
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Am I doing the most to make ME happy?


Three questions to ask yourself before year end to make sure you’re spending your time and energy wisely:
This weekend is one of the seven most powerful times of the year. Most know this as Fall Equniox, I like to call it a “SUPER POWER SELF LOVE DAY” – and if you want to make sure you’re doing the things that make you happy, you want to tap into this energy in the next few days (the official equinox is the 22nd, but you can surf the energy on either side, too!)
These Super Power Days are the time to stop, drop and have a check in with yourself – and the divine – to ensure your life is set on a course to bring you the things you really want – you know happiness, prosperity, love, peace, all that good stuff.
In your busy life with so much to do, it can be really easy to get off course – and you end up spending lots of your precious resources, time, energy and money on things that don’t really lead you to where you want to go. And we do not want that!
We want your life to be HAPPY & aligned with your heart and soul…
So a few things about Fall Equinox you want to know.
1. Fall Equinox is the middle of “harvest time” – so get clear on what you want to create and call in these last few months of the year – while you might not be a farmer pulling in the crops, you are pulling in the harvest of the dreams and intentions you set for yourself this year. Nine months into the year, its time to check in, before the full harvest time comes in late October.
2. Equinox is all about the ‘balance’ of things – it provides a unique opportunity to get still and go deeper within yourself, where the TRUE answers lie – when you unplug – even for 30 minutes – from your busy life to get into a place of deeper stillness you will find WISDOM.
Daring act of love: Make a date with yourself, get still, and ask yourself the following three questions – and get the wise answers. And then, no matter what, commit to following through on the actions that most align with your happiness – even if that means disappointing another.
Directions: Best to write the answer to these on paper where you can see them. Before each question, stop, read the question, put you hand on your heart (this will help you connect to your heart mind), and breathe. Then write whatever comes.
  1. What do I really want to call in to my life by the end of this year? What will create the MOST happiness and success for me for the rest of the year? Be specific, clear and focused. This is not the time to create a litany of things to DO, this is about being with what your heart and soul most want to call in. Ask your heart mind, not your monkey mind. Max four things. And do yourself the favor to connect in with all the places in your life – your work, your relationships, your health, your finances, your home, etc. – to see what is most calling you.
  1. What are the wisest ways for me to spend my precious resources – time, energy, money - right now? Answer this question for all three things – time, energy and money. Often when we think of resources we only think of money, but there are other resources that are just, if not more important – and you have finite amounts of these. We get into overwhelm or underwhelm when we aren’t real about our resources of time and energy. Consider all three.
  1. What wise actions can I take in the next 40 days to ensure this harvest of happiness and abundance comes in for me? While it would be nice to sit under a Bohdi tree and have this all show up at your feet, I don’t know how that works. I do know however that focused action connected to your heart and soul creates miracles and joy. So for each of the areas that you put a stake in the ground to create and call in by the end of this year – ask your heart mind, not your doing mind, what inspired, focused, wise actions you can take to manifest this into reality.
Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!

Monday, October 1, 2012

Life is about shortening the gap between where we are and where we’d like to be.

MIND THE GAP!

Life is about shortening the gap between where we are and where we’d like to be.
In all aspects.
Think about it. You want to get healthier or lose weight. You want to have a more committed spiritual practice. You want to be more creative and book more creative work.
The only way you’re going to get there is to keep going. There’s no other solution. No quick fix. No short cut. And that’s how you shorten the gap.
And it takes time.
NPR’s Ira Glass, talks about shortening the gap in the creative process between your creative desires and your output of work. He says that when we first begin to create, we do so because we have “great taste.” But as we start creating, our work is bad. It doesn’t fulfill the picture we have in our minds of what we want to be doing. He says there’s only one way to get to where we want to go in our creative lives.
Don’t quit.
Most people stop during this phase because what they’re creating doesn’t match their vision. But by continuing to do the work, you eventually start to create better and better work. Work you’re excited about. Work that means something. Work you can be proud of.
I think the biggest gap we need to shorten is the gap we create by judging our creative selves. We have such unkind things to say to ourselves, that we shut down creativity before our creative ideas have had a chance to take root and flower. And so again, we stop.
The judgments force stoppage.
The only way you’re going to get past the loudness of the noise in your head is by doing. Constantly. And eventually, the outpouring of work exceeds the things you say about yourself. That’s the tipping point. And you’ve then shortened the gap and gotten to the other side.
Every time you judge yourself this week, what if you took the energy and time you wasted on those negative beliefs and put them toward creating something that means something to you instead?
This is how you shorten the gap.
# # #
Anthony Meindl is an award-winning writer/director/producer/teacher and Artistic Director of Anthony Meindl’s Actor Workshop – where the “right brain rules” – in Los Angeles and New York. He is endlessly inspired by his students’ fearless creativity and is tireless in discovering new ways to help us all get out of our own way a little bit more each day. He just finished writing/directing his first feature film, Birds of A Feather.

Lisa Ekanger Your Hometown Realtor!