Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Nobody Training.

Here are three steps to help you practice NOBODY TRAINING so that you can keep loosening the ties that bind you to who you think you are and you don’t have to break your foot to let go. This Nobody Training is a derivative of my mentor and teacher, Dr. Ron Alexander’s work in his book, Wise Mind. Open Mind.
1. NOBODY MEDITATION.For 15 minutes every day sit in stillness and silence. Sit tall. Close your eyes. Follow your breath. Imagine all the roles that you play washing off of you like water off a duck’s back. See the masks you wear being peeled off. Practice letting go.
Imagine who you would be if you were not a mother, daughter, writer, teacher, entrepreneur, etc.
What would life be like if you moved to a different part of the country, started a whole new career? What new hobbies might you take up? Where would you travel? What kind of friends would you have if you lived in a parallel Uni-verse?
Keep emptying out. Every time you notice your mind center on what you “should” be doing, entertain the idea of something totally different. Example: If you’re trying to get fit or lose weight…What if you did like to exercise? What would your life be like? How does a healthy, thin person live? What are their habits and preferences?

2. NOTICE THE “I” MAKER.Notice throughout the day every time you use the word “I”, “me” or “mine”. What do you think defines you? Begin to notice all the stories you tell yourself every day about who you think you are, how you act, what you think are your habits. What if they weren’t true? What new stories, characteristics, habits, desires could you create for yourself?
In yoga psychology, we call this “Ahamkara” or the “I” maker. We invest an inordinate amount of time and energy building and preserving our sense of “I”. Begin to poke holes in the illusion of your false self and who you ‘think you are’. What exists underneath all of this?
3. BE ANONYMOUS.The next time you go to a new meeting, cocktail party, gathering, retreat or event – stay as anonymous as possible. Don’t tell people what you do. Let your “being” or energy speak for itself. Tell people you do something totally different. Ask them questions and engage on a level deeper than personality and small talk. Notice the tendency we have to project onto other people based on what little we know about them. Notice what other people tend to project onto you. Challenge yourself to resist making assumptions and stay open to the newness and all possibilities. What if all Wall St. brokers weren’t greedy? Or all yogi-meditators weren’t hippy-dippy? Invite contradictions.
Once I let go of my fixed idea of the ‘successful yoga teacher’ mask, I could finally relax into the truth that I really did not want to be teaching eight classes a week or be in a sweaty yoga room every day for the rest of my life. I definitely wanted to keep teaching, but I wanted to add a whole other dimension to my work: therapy, coaching, writing and more entrepreneurial endeavors that I simply didn’t have time for running all over town from class to class.
Then I met the love of my life, who happens to live in Aspen, Colorado. If my main source of income had still been local, group classes, I would have been much more resistant to splitting time and moving back and forth. In short, I had lightened my load of what I thought my life was supposed to look like and was open to receive the magic unfolding before me – a career change and a move cross country.
Please leave a comment with what roles you most easily get caught in. What are your “go to” tactics to stay clear and present in who you are today? How do you let go of who you were yesterday?
Lisa Ekanger Your Preferred Realtor!

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